


morning train rides

by Recarmdra



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Fluff, Hide Big Bang 2018, Kuroneki | Black-haired Kaneki, M/M, Secret Crush, Train AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-21
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-09 16:49:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14719896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Recarmdra/pseuds/Recarmdra
Summary: Their world is the Ikebukuro-bound train.Every spring morning, two strangers, Hide and Kaneki see each other in the same train car by coincidence…until it no longer is.





	1. Week 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my entry for Hide Big Bang 2018! Many, many thanks to our editor [ Remembrance](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Remembrance)! Also, special thanks to our artists baconflag and itshedaynagachika! I'll be linking their artworks when they have it up. Lastly, thank you to the organizers of the HBB event!

**DAY 1**

**Hide:**

_An Ikebukuro-bound train will shortly arrive at platform two. For your safety, please stand behind the yellow line._

Hide adjusts the headphones enclosing his ears, one hand scrolling through his playlist of Western songs and turning the volume a little louder. Nothing like starting the spring semester with Backstreet Boys singing about their comeback. Is he original? Is he the only one? Is he sexual? Yes, yes, and maybe _._ Point is: Hide is in a good mood.

The train comes to a stop not too long later, passengers alighting, and Hide boarding the car right after. He huffs a pleased breath when he sees that a seat at the corner is waiting for him. Just with that, already he can tell that this is going to be a good semester. He sits down, putting his bag on his lap and settling down for a twenty minute ride to Ikebukuro.

In this train of people of different characters, Hide has never gotten rid of his habit to people-watch. His eyes skim over from person to person, giving them a story of their own. For example, the man beside him is a salary man whose dream was to become a professional baseball player, but decided to give up his dream for the sake of the love of his life and his family. Now, he is watching the most recent game on his phone, reminiscing his high school glory days. Another would be the old woman sitting by the priority seats on her way to the city to experience a walk in the city park, instead of the one near her home, for a change of environment because staying at home can be such a bore, honestly. Her daughter keeps her from leaving the house because of her age, but to heck with that, right?

None of his stories might ever be true, but he enjoys it anyway…

Then there's this boy across him, nose buried in a book. He… well, he looked around his age on his way to school like him. He must be into what he’s reading with the way his brows furrow ever so slightly as he reads the book, deep in another world rather than where he is right now.

His story?

The walking library.

As in, he’s read so many books that his head must be a list of books that he can present an insightful commentary about. He eats, sleeps and breathes books, and the bags under his eyes might be from being unable to put down the book he has in his hands, even though he must have known to himself that the first day of class starts today.

Maybe he might even be right about that with the way he’s suddenly stifling a yawn with the hand. Nevertheless, his eyes return to focus on his book.

He huffs and let his eyes wander elsewhere as they come to another stop. More people flood inside the train on their way to Ikebukuro, and he loses sight of the young man across him.

Out of sight, out of mind. 

 

**Kaneki:**

Kaneki stifles a yawn that was forcing its way out of his lips, covering his mouth with his hand while the other holds the book he has been looking forward to reading since its release.

He hasn’t put it down except for the shower. While he’s eating, heck, while he was even asleep, he was holding on to that book for dear life, clinging to every word. It’s no surprise that even in the train he’s still reading, almost halfway through the book in his second day.

His eyes are hurting already though - not surprising, considering what he’s doing to them, but that doesn’t stop him. He glances up once to rest his eyes, catching sight of a blond boy with growing roots of dark brown hair. He has the faintest smile on his lips as if he has a secret, bright orange headphones enclosing his ears.

Not thinking of it again, his eyes return to the lovely words of his book.

It barely registers in his mind that he’d have to get off, not until legs began to brush against his knees and he realizes the train is emptying…though that may be the cause of lack of sleep. He isn’t paying much attention to anyone and anything.

He gingerly puts the book in his bag, and stands up, hugging his bag to himself as he alights the train.

Maybe it wasn’t a wise idea to stay up that late, but can he really help it?  


 

**DAY 3  
**

**Kaneki:**

He’s almost done with his book after another night of reading himself to sleep, and is due for another read once he does. He wants to drink in every detail, every message that the author so wittingly included in the book, wants to solve the book like a mystery.  He’s almost there at the final chapters of the book and he’s craving for the resolution, if there’d be any.

_Doors are now closing. Please take caution._

Kaneki is tuning out of the generically pleasant voice on the train as well as the sounds of the doors shutting, so he’s startled when a young, blond man abruptly makes his grand entrance by slipping through the doors just as it was about to close. Along with other passengers on the train, his attention is briefly on the blond leaning against the door and catching his breath.

 _How embarrassing…_ If it were Kaneki, he would have just given it up and waited for the next train rather than risk being stared at in the train. The blond looks like he’s giving himself a job well done for successfully getting through the closing doors.

His blond hair is a mess, and his bright orange headphones are all lopsided around his neck. His clothes are, well – his sense of fashion is standing out more than how it’s presented. He has a colorful taste in clothing is what he has in mind.

He looks like he’s had some morning.

As Kaneki is looking on with second hand embarrassment for the blond young man, bright brown eyes flicker over his direction. _Oh._ As fast as their eyes made contact, Kaneki averts his gaze and tries to return to the words of the book. He hates it when he meets eyes with strangers, but then again, perhaps he had been staring. His mother had taught him better manners than that.

 

**Hide:**

That was close. He almost, _almost_ missed this train. He wants to congratulate himself for the quick decisions he’s done to get here on time—otherwise, he would have waited another ten minutes and would have to rush to class as he rushed to the train station. He’d blame his alarm, but in the end, he knows who’s at fault here.

As he pats down his hair and tries to look more presentable, his eyes meeting gazes with someone else for a brief moment. Hide tries to offer a sheepish smile, aware that he must have witnessed his abrupt entrance there, but the other had already has his eyes glued on his book before he can even move a muscle.  

Oh.

Oh well.

Letting out a soft exhale, Hide pulls his headphones over his ears and begins to play his morning song playlist, cooling down after that unanticipated run. He’s so glad he’s not going to have to run to class this early in in semester.

With that out of the way though, Hide begins to look at the passengers of the train to entertain himself for the next twenty minutes. Like, just to his right is a family of tourists from somewhere in South East Asia. The mother and the father are talking to each other with delighted looks on their faces, and standing a couple of feet away looking away as if he isn’t with them – even though his matching bag gives him away - is their son. His story goes that this family has won a round-trip ticket to Japan. This is their first time so it’s natural that they’d only look this delighted, but the son—oh, they’re getting off.

Hide pouts to himself. He isn’t finished yet.

As his eyes follow the family leaving the train, he catches a glimpse of that dark haired boy from earlier, still sitting on his seat and reading that awfully thick book. His eyes stay on him for as long as there is no one blocking his view. He has… an odd feeling of deja vu here, though he can’t particularly tell from where he has seen this before. There are many passengers who read on the train after all.

_Next stop is Ikebukuro. The door on the right side will open. This is the final station of the Seibu Ikebukuro Line._

Hide barely hears the voice through the music, and immediately, he looks out the window in realization that the train is indeed arriving at Ikebukuro soon.

Thank god he got on this train.

 

**DAY 5**

**Kaneki:**

Ever since Wednesday, Kaneki has been glancing at the door once they arrive at, wondering about that blond that had made a sudden entrance. He… sure made an impression then if he had thought about him during his commute. It must have been the hair and the loud clothes. It’s highly improbable that he’d see him ever again though. Or… Maybe he has a schedule, he realizes as a familiar blond goes through the doors.

Kaneki blinks as he _actually_ recognizes him and watches as he takes a seat across him. Discreetly, of course, pretending to be completely engrossed in his book. He’s wearing those headphones today too, listening to music by the way he notices his lips seemingly mouthing the words to the song.

Yet when he sees the other looking his way, he quickly stares hard at the words of his book. Oh. He hopes he doesn’t recognize him—he remembers he’s been caught looking at him before. Then again, most likely not. He has a… forgettable face, he thinks. He’s very plain. Unlike the boy across him… There is something about him that makes him look like he’d make a lasting impression on _anyone_.

 

**Hide:**

Hide is very much rested today, thankfully.

After scrolling through his songs in his phone, he looks across him and sees a familiar boy engrossed in his book. Hide looks on curiously. Didn’t he see him the other day too? Now that he thinks about it, could he be the same boy reading in the same place last Monday? Highly possible. He’s in the same position in different clothing after all.

_Huh._

Monday to Friday, reading a book. He bets that he reads at home too. Don’t his eyes ever get tired from reading? He can’t see himself reading a book that long…

With the end of that thought, his eyes look around the passenger car for anyone interesting-looking to do his morning stories on. That boy isn’t really his business, but from time to time, his curious eyes would fall on the dark haired boy deep into reading his book. 

He looks so quiet, that guy.


	2. Week 2

**DAY 8**

**Hide:**

Hide gets in the train, pleased to see a vacant seat at the corner, and without second thoughts, takes a seat. Being early is great, honestly. He gets to sit down throughout the train ride if he wants to, and that is honestly much better than standing for twenty minutes where he may possibly rub bodies with someone else as the train fills with each stop. It’s a good thing that he lives near the end of the train line - there’d always be a seat waiting for him if he’s early.

As the train comes to a stop, a few more passengers get in, taking the remaining seats available. It seems that much like himself yesterday, there is one old lady that comes in last before the doors close, dragging along her strolley of belongings. She looks around, futilely hoping to find a seat, and it’s only instinct that Hide offers his as it was closest to the door where she can easily get off later. 

“You can take my seat,” he says with a polite smile, slinging his bag on his shoulder. 

Her eyes brighten as she tilts her head upward to look at him. “Oh, thank you, young man.” Her voice is frail, but Hide can hear the energy behind it as she walks toward the empty seat. Hide is sure to have his hands ready to catch her if she happens to tip over with the swaying of the train. He can never be too careful with that. She laughs gratefully for that.    


Though now that he’s given her his seat, he’s standing and he thinks he should, uh, find another place to stand on other than in front of the lady. He turns around and catches the walking library already seated, sneaking a peek behind his book. Caught in the act, he instantly raises his book a little higher.

The  corner of Hide’s lips quirk into a little smile as he steps over to the other side.

 

**Kaneki:**

_ He’s here again this week…  _ He wonders if this is just a coincidence that the boy often ends up in this passenger car. It probably is.

As they come to another stop, more people come inside to take their seats, but his eyes fall on the old woman that comes in last. The fact that she is an old woman that can’t stand by her own legs gets Kaneki standing himself to offer his seat -- well, rather than offer, more like move elsewhere without a word and allow her to see the vacant seat. He’s sure anyone considerate enough will realize that it’s for her and not anyone else. 

_Look here, look here_ – ah. 

Kaneki begins to sit down slowly as he notices the blond having similar intentions. Being vocal about it helps get her attention, he supposes. He brings his book up a little while he watches as the blond repeatedly and sheepishly bows his head at her as he’s thanked, and it catches him by complete surprise when he notices the blond looking over his shoulder. Looking at  _ him _ . 

In a panic, he once more retreats to his book.

The words don’t process. They won’t process, not especially when he he realizes that there is a figure standing perpendicularly from him. He’s subtle - or at least, pretends to be subtle, when he tries to look at his face. He has a...friendly face is what he can say, one that looks approachable. What will he make of that? Of course, nothing. He shouldn’t even be  _ looking  _ at him to even have those thoughts in the first place.

As he decides that he should just read his book, a sudden turbulence in the movement of the train startles him and his book ends up on the floor. He almost gasps. He didn’t mark his page!

Just as he was about to pick it up by himself, a tanned hand beats him to it and Kaneki looks up before he even realizes who that hand could have belonged to. It’s like his breath had hitched in his throat when he makes eye contact with bright, friendly brown eyes. He doesn’t say anything, and neither does the other when he extends out the book he dropped, along with a little smile.

Hesitantly, Kaneki just… bows his head in gratitude, unable to meet his eyes all of a sudden. He’s blushing, isn’t he?

Thankfully, the his stop comes right after this...wordless conversation of theirs, and Kaneki doesn’t even think twice before standing up and leaving with his head down. He won’t see him again. It’s okay. 

 

**DAY 10**

**Hide:**

It’s a coincidence, when Hide enters the train that morning, there is a vacant seat right next to the boy sitting at the corner. He doesn’t think much of it when he takes a seat, but he does realize that the person beside him is sleeping rather soundly. He didn’t even open his eyes even a little. He must be tired.    


Hide doesn’t pay much attention on him throughout the trip. There’s no need for him to, especially when the boy is fast asleep, until that is, he notices the way that pretty little head is tilting over his side, and he lowers and lowers  _ and lowers _ _ — _ until his head his comfortably resting on his shoulder. Um.  _ Okay.  _ He stays still, ever so unsure of what to do in this situation. He just lets him sleep there. He can’t bring himself to do anything that’ll embarrass him. He knows the feeling of being shrugged off someone’s shoulder. It’s not good. 

…Anyway, he sounds like a creep right now, but he notes that his shampoo faintly smells of mandarin. 

What? He can’t help it! His hair is right there! He just can’t stop breathing, can he? 

He has him sleeping on his shoulder for a good… fifteen minutes. Thankfully, the boy shifts positions at the turbulence of the train, and Hide quietly sighs in relief. He’s still fast asleep…  He’s that tired, huh? He must have been all night reading - that’s his hunch, anyway. He’s almost at the station he got down on last time though - shouldn’t he be waking up by now? 

Tapping him on the shoulder isn’t an option. He shouldn’t  _ know  _ that he needs to get off the next stop after all. What Hide does instead is to pretend to get comfortable on the seat, in other words, wiggling his butt closer to the back support, and he damn smiles when he sees those eyes fluttering open.

 

**Kaneki:**

Sleepy… He’s really sleepy.    


Maybe he’s overdone it this time. He had a piece of literature he had to read for class today, and actually dared to finish the book he’s been reading for leisure. He couldn’t just stop halfway the concluding chapter. Anyone would agree to that, right? As that decision is the one that led him to self-satisfaction, it’s also the decision that promptly knocked him out on the train on the way to work at Anteiku. 

He doesn’t like falling asleep on the train for many reasons, mostly because he might not wake up and miss his station... There is also a chance of pickpocketing, even though the chances of that are slim in Japan... He might look silly sleeping... He might unintentionally sleep on someone’s shoulder-- ahh, he hates that last one. He hates it whenever someone leans on his shoulder, and he can’t bring himself to shrug them off. He doesn’t want to do that to someone else. 

But sometimes you just can’t fight sleep, can you? Even if he doesn’t want to, he falls asleep on the train anyway. He doesn’t want to admit how satisfying it is despite all the reasons why he hates sleeping on trains. 

He dreams of being in another country in autumn. It’s pretty nice. 

He’s just glad that when he wakes up, none of his fears happened.  He’s conveniently one station away; his bag is left untouched. He doesn’t know what he looked like asleep, but at least he wasn’t sleeping on someone’s shoulder. 

He’s still a little out of it upon waking up, but the moment he starts examining his surroundings, one sight wakes him up completely. 

The profile he sees at the corner of his eye is a better alarm than his phone. He feels his entire body freeze as if it doesn’t know what to do until he realizes that he doesn’t have to do anything. He just has to sit here and...and wait for the train to arrive at his station. Every now and then, he couldn’t resist the urge to subtly glance at the blond’s direction and he wonders:    


Why is he smiling like he has a secret? 

 

**DAY 12**

**Hide:**

_ Doors are now closing. Please take caution. _

“Shit, shit, shit!” Hide makes a run for the closest door to the train. Never mind it’s not the car he always rides. What’s important is that he gets  _ inside  _ on time. He can’t believe this is the second time this  _ month  _ that he almost missed his train. Running a marathon is not the type of morning he likes to have. Is it his fault that the snooze has a fifteen minutes gap between the time he has to wake up? Yes? Oh. Okay.

It’s another close one for him today, and Hide looks at the corner in which he always finds the bookworm so far. Someone else is there, obviously, but he can’t help but wonder if he’d still be there in the other car. Why does he stay in that car all the time anyway?    


Hide doesn’t have a reason why he chooses to stay at the passenger car he rides to Ikebukuro. He just happens to find himself there every time, not because it’s close to the exits - not because it’s close to the entrance either. It doesn’t really matter what car he rides. It’s all the same, right? It’s different people everyday no matter what train he rides. 

However, he has come to a realization these days that that maybe it isn’t true at all. It has never occurred to him that there might be a constant face in his morning train rides to school.  It’s sort of interesting if that’s really the case. It sounds like a story he’d read in a comic book...

Anyway - If this is car five...then he needs to go all the way to car eight. 

Should he? 

It’s definitely an idea to consider, especially when he knows he’d be brushing past people standing along the train corridors. He wants to laugh at himself though. Why is he still weighing the pros and cons when he’s  already making his way towards the next car? 

 

**Kaneki:**

That blond boy isn’t here today… Maybe it was just a coincidence that they’re on the same train every other morning last week. It just seems so unlikely to him that he’d see the same person everyday - rarely anyone stays in the same passenger car after all. He just stays here because it’s the closest to the exit at his stop. 

So perhaps yesterday was the last time that he’s seen that blond? Maybe that’s a good thing. He remembers how embarrassing he must look yesterday… and the other day too now that he thinks about it. He just has that face that’s so friendly and… and vaguely handsome -- and that’s a sort of face that he’s not used to seeing staring right at him.

God, the reminder of his reaction yesterday gets him resisting the urge to cringe. He should just not think about it and read. Train time is supposed to be reading time...as is any of his free time. He shouldn’t be thinking about someone insignificant in the first place. 

The sound of someone coming in from another passenger car grabs his attention for a second, and his eyes widen for a quick second when he sees who it is walking across him and staying at one corner. 

_ Speak of the devil.  _

So he isn’t absent… Just got lost, he supposes, got in another passenger car. The question is: why did he have a need to go all the way here? If it were him, he would have likely stayed in where he had gotten in, even if it’s just for a day. It’s not like it’s statistically proven that more persons leave the a certain passenger car at certain stops, and will therefore leave more seats to choose from... Perhaps it doesn’t feel right for him to be somewhere else? Maybe he likes seeing a certain ad in this particular car. 

Either way, he’s here now.

He’s sort of glad.    



	3. Week 3

**DAY 15**

**Hide:**

As always, as soon as Hide enters the train, headphones are in place over his ears playing foreign music, and his eyes glance over to the left to see if a certain dark haired college boy is sitting on the corner. His lips quirk into a little smile when he sees that he is, reading a book like always. For the nth time, he wonders what he’s reading -- but for the first time, he dares to think of trying to find out.    


Of course, ideas like those needs to come with an opportunity. He can’t just walk up to him and look at what he’s reading like a creep. These things need subtlety. And what perfect timing it is when the man sitting next to the college boy stands up to leave for the next stop? Hide no longer hesitates when he seats himself beside the boy with the book for the first time. 

As inconspicuous as he can, Hide tilts his head ever to slightly over to the side to see what it is that the boy keeps reading all the time. Romance books? Light novels? Has he been staring at a blank page all along? 

He drops the last one as a possibility when he sees that there are, in fact, words on the book. There is a lot of them, and… and  _ damn _ . There is so much difficult kanji characters that he can’t comprehend in one look. He has to stare at them long enough to be anywhere near comprehension, not realizing how he’s leaning a little bit closer to the other. It’s too difficult - or perhaps it’s because of the music playing in his ears.

More importantly, this boy can understand all that?

Without realizing how much closer he has gotten, there is a faint scent that Hide is picking up that alerts him that he may have gotten an inch too close. He shifts position naturally, but he can’t help but wonder about that scent. He expects that he’d smell like books, but surprisingly, the boy smells more of coffee and fresh linen… and mandarin, with that shampoo of his. He still remembers that. 

 

**Kaneki:**

It’s clear to Kaneki now that he’d see that blond boy more often if he’s like him who prefers to stay in certain passenger cars. It’s been two weeks already and he’s been seeing this blond boy around every time he’s here. The other must already acknowledge his existent at some extent, but...he never really thought that he’d be  _ this  _ conspicuous in showing that acknowledgement.    


Kaneki is mildly annoyed… and mildly flustered. He can’t concentrate on reading his book with the other so close to him. More importantly, are his ears alright? He can hear his music playing through his headphones, and if he can hear it, the volume must not be at an acceptable level.

...Since he’s this close already, then… it’s not his fault if he tries to listen to what’s playing, right? He  _ is  _ sorta curious what sort of music he listens to. His attention is no longer on his book but on the stifled music playing close to his ear. It sounds familiar, but it sounds foreign… An American song? Must be a popular song that plays in stores recently. 

Does he understand that?

All the while, Kaneki can feel the other trying to read what’s on his book. He’s trying to be subtle about it, he’s sure, but he can’t be anymore obvious with the way he is craning his neck over to his side. He can see the way his eyes narrow and widen in attempt to read the small characters, and frankly, he looks ridiculous. He tries not to laugh at it so that both of them won’t be put in an awkward position. 

Ah… he smells sweet. Kaneki can tell the faint scent of vanilla and cinnamon on him. How is it that his appearance reminds him of summer and his scent makes him think of autumn? On the other hand… the guy is dangerously close to invading his personal space if he can tell what he smells like… If he gets any closer, he might start to blush. 

Thankfully, he doesn’t. 

Kaneki doesn’t know what he’s thinking when he tries to catch a glimpse of the other -- because when he did, their eyes ever so briefly meet again. They’re  _ both  _ surprised that they face forward without daring to look again until he needs to get off the train.

So much for not putting themselves in an awkward position. 

 

**DAY 17**

**Kaneki:**

Kaneki watches with amusement as his commuting friend is nodding off while standing and holding onto the train handle. He’s swaying a little side by side to the movement of the vehicle, and he can see that there is barely any consciousness in his eyes even though he struggles to keep them open.

The boy with headphones is sleepy today.  

Maybe he had been up all night hanging out with friends? He does look like the type to be invited to all sorts of parties by all sorts of people. He has just that friendly aura about him – the life of the party type. It’s a bad idea to party all night on a weekday though.

Why is he staying in this passenger car when the seats are full? He thinks the other cars still have vacant seats… Why would he tolerate having to stand?

He thinks it’s okay to look while he’s at this state. The other is barely conscious of his surroundings, of what he even looks like right now to the rest of the passengers. He sort of feels bad that he has to stand…but at the same time, it’s getting amusing to watch when the other is starting to sway and head banging like he’s listening to metal music through those orange headphones of his.

He feels bad,  _ really _ , but is Kaneki putting so much effort trying not to laugh at the sight of him. Still, no hard effort of his can actually stop the giggles that escape his throat when the other almost doubles over when the train runs along a curved track and then surprises everyone with a… sneeze? It’s not even a cute sneeze. It’s a terribly ugly sneeze that would scare children.    


It gets funnier when the universe decides to let him see if he’s right. 

A baby in the car starts crying and Kaneki puts his book over his face because by now his shoulders are shaking and his head tilts back without his permission. This is _ hilarious.  _ He feels terrible for laughing. The boy is absolutely making his day.

**Hide:**

He should  _ not  _ have played video games all night. Maybe he should have gone out with those upperclassmen after all, but ahh, he doesn’t like being with them… They’re not that interesting at all.  Perhaps hanging out with them could have resulted to a better morning though.

  
Hide hadn’t realized at all he had been swayin so much until he almost topples over as he lets out a quiet little sneeze. It’s a good thing that he’s holding onto the hanging strap. Otherwise, that would have been ugly, huh? 

He wakes at the sound of a child crying, and opens his eyes realizing that everyone is looking at him. They’re rather nasty looks... What’s the matter with  _ them? _ They’re looking at him like he  _ caused  _ that.    


… _ Did _ he cause that?

His eyes fall on the boy who looks like he’s in physical pain holding back his laughter to check if he’s been watching. Self explanatory. There are others who are low-key laughing too. It’s suddenly no question that the laughter is because of him and a comedy show that he’s not aware he’s starring. 

Never mind that he had looked foolish just now. Look at that boy smiling. It’s the first time he’s seen him smile like that, and he swears that it’s not the book that’s caused that. It’s cute. He likes it. 

Despite the embarrassment, at least he had been a good source of entertainment for a certain bookworm. All he hopes is that he doesn’t think he’s a loser for it. 

 

**DAY 19**

**Kaneki:**

Kaneki most definitely does not think the boy is a loser. In fact, he describes him as someone he is starting to look forward to seeing in the mornings because of the...eventful mornings that he provides. 

Because Kaneki told some staff of Anteiku what occurred in the train most recently and laughed together at the story, he has their interest about the boy in the train piqued by now. After all, who meets the same person thrice a week on the same train  _ and  _ makes their Kaneki laugh like that? It’s like a drama. Kaneki doesn’t know whether their interest is a good thing or a bad thing, but it has a tendency to incline on the bad side, especially when they ask for one request: 

_ “Can we see a picture of him?” _

He should have known this day would come.

Phones in Japan are programmed to have sounds whenever they take photos, mostly to alarm someone if a photo is being taken without permission. Kaneki is obviously  _ against  _ taking a photo of the boy with the headphones, because hello? It’s downright creepy, isn’t it? They say it’s for “reference” so that they will be able to give their thoughts, and he’ll try to believe that. He doesn’t know what they’ll do if he doesn’t even try. Probably nothing, but still. He doesn’t want to disappoint them. 

So here he is, hiding his phone behind his book, the camera lense peeking a little over the top. He’s been debating over this ever since he had gotten on the train, but since his stop is just a few minutes away, it’s now or … next week. 

He sees the boy in the screen, looking outside the window while subtly mouthing the words to whatever he is listening to. He looks so serene like that, doesn’t he? The sight of him is...strangely refreshing. 

Now, the plan is to capture the photo when the doors open, let out a cough just as the camera lets out the sound just in case, and quietly make his escape. Yes. Good plan.

That is until he looks his way.

_ Oh shit.  _

And his fingers decide to press the shutter button. 

_ Oh shit. Oh shit.  _

And the cough comes after.

He fucked up. 

Kaneki’s cheeks turn a bright red when he realizes that he had almost gotten caught. The only distraction that Kaneki gets, fortunately, is when the train reaches the station and the passengers begin to alight. 

In an attempt to escape being seen blushing any further and possibly be called out, Kaneki quickly stands in panic to leave the train to be the first out. It barely registers that the book on his lap falls onto the floor because he’s too busy _leaving_ with his phone and only realizes it once he’s stepped out of the train empty-handed. Kaneki whips around to nab his book inside the train, but there’s a moment of indecisiveness in his step as Kaneki debates whether to run back inside, grah his book, and run out before the door closes. Yes, that’s the plan.

But he’s not that fast, is he? And he epically failed his first plan just now. And he’d get attention if he goes around with a sense of urgency like that, and the boy inside is there...

But…  _ his book… _

He needs to decide quickly. If not--

“Ah.”  

A feeling of regret dawns on Kaneki now that his book is considered  _ lost  _ as the doors of the train shut close. Well… there’s always the lost and found office at the station he can go back to next week, right?

Sighing as the train announces its departure, Kaneki decides to give up on reading that book this weekend. …But maybe this hadn’t been a meaningless accident after all when his heart jumps at the sight of the blond passenger standing behind the narrow window of the doors. His eyes follow as the train starts to move forward and he sees that he’s trying to tell him something. He’s no lip-reader, so he can’t understand what he’s trying to say behind the window, but the act of letting him see his book in his hand sends him the message quite well, he thinks.

_ I’ll return it to you next week. _

The train is gone in a matter of seconds, and Kaneki is still standing there watching as the train disappears from sight. It doesn’t sink in until that moment what had just happened:  _ He has his book _ , and… he’ll return it next week. That’s his chance, isn’t it? Maybe his only chance to talk to him, finally.

As he turns around to leave the station, his eyes catches his reflection in the the security mirror.

...When had he been smiling?

 

  * **Extra**



 

“Kaneki-kun! The picture is blurry!” 

“Eh!?”

 


	4. Week 4

**DAY 22**

**Hide:**

Until now, he feels like a great opportunity had been bestowed upon him with the other leaving his book by accident like that. He knows for a fact that no one else would pick it up, and that means leaving it there to be trampled on. He doesn’t think that the other would appreciate seeing that condition in the lost and found office, knowing how much he reads books and how good his books look each time.  It’s… It’s better that he knows he has it, right?

It’s raining today - actually, it’s been raining the entire weekend - but it feels that no weather will stop him from coming in time for his morning train.

It’s become clear to Hide how the ride on the morning train has become the highlight of his day. He’d see his commuting crush - yes, his commuting crush - on the same seat at the corner with a book in hand. Will he be reading a new book today? Or will he be empty-handed in hopes that he’d give his book back to him? Maybe have a little chat after about it. Truth be told, Hide hasn’t read any more than the summary provided at the back and he thinks that’s enough to start a conversation about it. Right? Who knows, looks can be deceiving - the other might be the talkative type.

He’ll find out soon enough as he waits a little eagerly behind the yellow lines of the platform. The pleasant sounds of the train incoming gets Hide rocking on his heels and fighting the urge to smile. How should he do it? Should he just hand it back to him? Should he say something first?

 _“Good morning!”_ He practices in his head, _“I kept it for you.”_

Sounds creepy.

_“That’s what you call a ‘suspense’ book, huh?”_

Sounds stupid.

He should have thought this through first instead of listing a number of ways to impress the other. What should he say first to him? How will it end up being more than just a “here” and “thank you”?

There is a lack of time to think of what to say, deciding to just let what will happen, happen. He’s just here to return a book after all, right?   

With all things said and done, when the train comes to a stop, Hide takes a deep breath. Here goes nothing.

He steps inside, and his eyes immediately fall on the corner seat by the door. The usual bright look in his eyes falls flat with disappointment and a little bit of confusion when someone else is seated there.  He’s not on his usual seat today.

Well, not all hope is lost though, because his eyes naturally try to find a shy-looking college boy among the passengers of the train car.  He could have sat elsewhere.

Unsuccessful.

He’s not here today.

Hide’s bottom lip sticks out in a rather disappointed pout as he takes one last look around and directs his gaze to the book in hand.

What could have happened? Maybe he overslept today. Maybe the professor cancelled class. Maybe he’s scared to face him because he caught him trying to take his photo? He doesn’t know. What he _does_ know is that he’ll be keeping this book for another day. Maybe he’ll show up on Wednesday and he can return it then.  

 

**DAY 24**

**Hide:**

Of course, having the book in his care for the past two days, even though he’s not an avid reader, he’d be curious about what the other has been reading, what type of books he likes. It’s insulting when his friends make fun of him for bringing a book around, acting as if he reads.  And when he actually _reads_ they laugh at him even more, though he supposes they do have the grounds for it. He doesn’t read much. They ask what had gotten him to reading and such a complex book too, and they accuse him of trying to impress someone.

He didn’t know whether that was true or not.

Either way, more importantly, he inevitably finds out that the shy-looking book lover in the train is into dark themes: losing loved ones, depression, death and suicide... He hasn’t read even one fourth of this book but he can already tell the depressing direction it’s going. He’s getting invested in it though, that at home, instead of a console in hand, he has the book instead. He might need a bookmark for this, though he knows it’s not right. This book isn’t his.

It gave him an idea though.

Holding the book in his hand that Wednesday morning, Hide waits for the incoming train.

He was hopeful and… a little bit eager to return the book. All that hope and eagerness just turns into disappointment in the end when he enters the train and sees no sight of the book-loving commuter.

He wonders what happened to him. He hopes it wasn’t anything bad… and he hopes that this isn’t actually happening by the intention of the other boy.

Hide finds a vacant seat and sits down, examining the book in his hand. He’ll just think that he’s giving him time to finish the book – because with twenty minutes until Ikebukuro, Hide decides to just continue where he had left off.

 

**DAY 26**

**Hide:**

Why is the book so depressing? Is this what he _reads_ all the time? Is behind that shy smile a boy who can relate to the characters of this story? Not that he doesn't like it. He's rather fond of this type of genre himself. While he has many questions about the book and its direction, he has just as much questions about the owner – who he hopes will be present in the train today.

Sadly, he’s met with disappointment.

He isn’t in the train again today…

It’s more worrying than he imagined it to be not to see him for an entire week already, but he tries not to think the worst case scenarios. He knows how life works, after all. The most unexpected happen.   

He just wants to see him.

He’ll definitely be bringing it again next week. Hopefully the other is okay.

Meanwhile, he hasn’t made up stories about other passengers in a while, he realizes, and at the same time thinks it’s all because his attention has been drawn by one single passenger lately. Sighing inward, he looks around to occupy his mind for a little while. Like on that boy in the loud green t-shirt who could possibly look like an elf on vacation considering it’s not peak season in his line of work.


	5. Week 5

**DAY 29**

**Hide:**

It’s been an entire week since he’s last seen his commuting crush, huh? Hide hasn’t finished the book, but hopefully he shows up today. If he doesn’t he’ll assume he just doesn’t want to be in the same train as him. He wouldn’t like to think that he had gotten into an accident of some sort. It’s better to think that he’s unlikable to him rather than thinking he’s not here because he’s hurt. He would never really know.

Is it odd that he sort of misses him despite their lack of interaction? Was it just him that felt some sort of… interest to him?

Is it nothing but a heartache? Is it nothing but a mistake----? 

_ Ugh.  _ Next song. 

Adjusting his headphones and increasing the volume of the music from his phone, Hide stands at the platform, watching as the train approaches with lowered expectations. The doors open, and there’s still one last little bit of hope that the owner of the book will be there today. If not – then it looks like he’ll be finishing this book this week after all.

When Hide enters, he gives a dismissive glance at the spot where he often sees the other sit, and does a double take when he sees a pale dark-haired boy with a book. It’s like in a snap his eyes are full of life again with delight.

It’s him! 

He’s back!

Or is he? He’s wearing a face mask –

The boy shyly looks up at him while he was confirming that his eyes aren’t deceiving him and they meet gazes for the first time in a long time.

The look in his eyes tells him that it’s  _ definitely _ him.

It’s no question that he looks happy to see him after a long time, though at the same time, there’s also a little bit of curiosity and concern when he realizes that he might have been sick recently with that mask on and all.

They only ever see each other three times a week after all—though it dawns on him that he shouldn’t look too happy. He has to be conscious, he supposes, because they’re just two strangers who happen to be on the same train. That’s barely even acquaintances. Even if he thinks he’s cute, that fact doesn’t change.

He’s certain now that they’re aware of each other though. They just know nothing about each other, not even a name.

Good thing he had come in prepared to solve that problem.

 

**Kaneki:**

Kaneki has a love-hate relation with spring. The cherry blossoms are beautiful – yes, he agrees with that. Yet along with spring comes allergies, rain, unstable weather and all the forces that ensure he’ll get sick one of these spring days. Their relationship proves to be just as strong this year when just one month into classes and he’s already had a full-blown fever. He’s already missed an entire week, practically bed-ridden and left to care for himself.

Speaking of missed for an entire week…he wondered if the blond had looked for him during his absence. Or is it too assuming to think that he’ be looking for him in the first place? He won’t admit it to himself, but a part of him sort of hope he did.

So when the train arrives on the station where the boy with headphones comes in, Kaneki feels certain anticipation when those doors open. At first, he thinks it’s best to just… pretend to look at his book, but he can’t help but see if he had come in through the door. It barely even comes to mind that maybe he’d look his way too, but to his surprise, he sees him staring at him, all wide eyed in surprise and… smiling as if he’s saying that it’s nice to see him again. 

That sort of confirms his suspicions if he had been looking for him, hasn’t it?

Kaneki, an ever easy man to fluster, blushes when he sees that smile directed at him. He tries not to be too obvious about what that smile does to him, and just tries to smile back at him even though it’s only a small smile and hidden behind the mask.

It’s becoming evident to Kaneki that they’re not merely two strangers in the train anymore. They’re acknowledging each other when they get in, looking for one another even though they know nothing about each other. He doesn’t know if that’s a… thing he wants to find himself in, considering it’s basically an odd friendship founded on nothing. He shouldn’t be too happy to see him again, shouldn’t be attached to him in anyway. He’d only be disappointed if he disappears one day, right?

Yes… he’s going to disappear in a matter of weeks. When the spring semester ends, it’s unlikely that he’d ever see him again.

He also knows that there is a solution to this, but he doesn’t see himself having the courage to do it. This is a train after all – it’s far from a social setting. It’s no place to do introductions, and following him to whichever station he gets down on is out of the question. There’s just no way. Whatever they have will stay in the train, he decides.

Along the way to his stop, he wonders about his book. The other should still have it, right? He doesn’t know whether he should ask for it or not… but he’s more inclined to do the latter. He… expects the other to return it by himself.

Except he doesn’t.

By the time he arrives at his station, the trip had been… uneventful.  No returning of the books and no funny gimmicks by the other. He was even kind of hesitant to leave the train by the time the door opens, but he goes out without words.

…Odd.

 

**DAY 31**

**Hide:**

Shit, he flaked out on giving back the book last Monday.

It’s not as easy as he thought it would be, especially knowing what the book contains. The embarrassment had caught up to him before he even gives it –and he can only imagine that he’d want to bury himself underground once he hands it over. He knows he has to give it back sooner or later though – he doesn’t want the other to think he had lost it and that’s why he’s not giving it back, or worse, keeping it  _ because _ it’s his.

He’s going to do it today for sure though, and he proves it to himself by already having the book out while he’s waiting for the train to arrive. He has his headphones around his neck as if to focus him on one thing and one thing only: give back the book.

_ An Ikebukuro-bound train will shortly arrive at platform two. For your safety, please stand behind the yellow line. _

Once that train stops, Hide waits for the passengers to alight and gets in. He looks over the seat where the boy usually sits and gives a little smile when they meet eyes. He receives a meek bow in return, and god, was that acknowledgement enough get his heart beating faster than normal. He positions himself perpendicular from the other, avoiding eye contact while he fights to urge to smile a little wider.

He didn’t expect that— but this is good, right?

Now, when does he give the book back? 

**Kaneki:**

Kaneki is sort of thankful that he’s still wearing a face mask. It’s useful in hiding the flush rising to his cheeks when he sees the other smile, and as he bows his head as a form of greeting. It’s his ears that are giving him away though. He hopes the other doesn’t notice. 

He tries to concentrate on his book as per usual so that he doesn’t end up looking at the blond commuter too much, though he still wonders when he will get back the book he had left with him. He…still hasn’t finished it, after all, and he does want it back. Maybe he’s waiting for him to ask? He’s too shy to do that though. 

As he peers over the blond in his curiosity, his eyes do spot the book in his hand.  _ Oh _ . Is he planning to give it back some time before he gets off? Though he always thinks of wanting it back, he’s suddenly not sure anymore. The thought of the other approaching him and talking to him deliberately gets his hand feeling a little clammy, his heart beating a tad bit faster…

As his station draws closer, the more he prepares himself. Every movement he sees on his left gets him raising his head to see if it’s him, but every time he mistakes it as just another passenger. He’s still there where he’s standing. 

_ Come on, come on…  _ He doesn’t know whether to feel impatient, or wish that he wouldn’t come, otherwise he’d combust.

He’s just one station away, and as passengers start to alight the train, he notices a pair of obnoxiously pink colored shoes in front of his plain black ones. For once, he’s scared to look up because he  _ knows _ that it’s him this time. The train moves toward his stop, but Kaneki doesn’t dare raise his head just yet. Good thing too, because this way he notices his book dropping to their feet.

He stares at it in confusion, rather stupidly, even, before the thought of picking it up even comes to mind. “Ah, oops. Here you go,” comes a friendly voice. It feels awfully familiar when a tanned hand reaches down to get it, and it’s extended toward him. He peeks up at the other, and he’s grinning in a way that it reminds him of the sun. “It keeps dropping, huh?”

Is…Is he pretending that he only dropped it today and not almost two weeks ago?

“Th…Thanks.”

Just as he’s about to subtly scan through the pages, Kaneki realizes that the voice over the train is announcing that he’s arrived at his stop.  The blond moves out of the way before he says anything else, probably because he already knows that this is stop. In the brief eye contact they made, the other blurts out a “Bye”.

Kaneki tries not to smile, “Bye.”

Kaneki gets down the train and inspects the book briefly with an amused little smile that he can no longer hold back. He doesn’t think it has damages, but he does wonder what this has gone through. Did he read it? Did he just keep it in his bag during his absence? He immediately notices the difference when he examines it— _ ah. _

The spine has creases…

He frowns. He’s always careful with the spine of the book. That wouldn’t be there had the other not opened it long enough to make those creases. That answers the question if he’s been reading often.

As he flips around the pages, it appears that the crease isn’t the only surprise the other left him. There’s something stuck between the pages. Flipping through the pages, he soon finds a note:

**As expected, you have good taste in books! The story is really interesting!  
I’m a slow reader though, so I didn’t get to finish it… T T  
This is a bookmark to prove it!  
I can even summarized the book:**

His lips form a grin upon seeing a drawing of the book in a beach, with a sun with shades and everything. Hah. “Summer-ized”. He gets it. His joke sucks -- but he’s amused despite its tackiness. More importantly though, he has found out amazing information about the other.

**See you around!**

**\- Hide**

_ So his name is Hide… _

 

**DAY 33**

**Kaneki:**

It’s raining today.

Kaneki almost didn’t get up because of the mood-dampening weather this morning, but his desire to be on time weighed far more than his desire to sleep for another ten minutes. He's feeling more motivated these days to go to work in the morning because it means getting twenty minutes to see Hide. It must be a big deal, huh, considering how late he’s slept late last night thinking too much about the book, about Hide and about the note he’s left for him – and he doesn’t mean  _ Hide’s _ note.

He means his own note that’s now in between the pages of the book as he waits for his train arrives. He has no idea if he’s doing the right thing with this at all, but…

He only ever sees him thrice a week, doesn’t he? And their days of seeing each other might be counted considering summer break will come faster than he realizes. It’s been more than a month since this has started. He won’t be seeing him anymore after this semester.

_ That _ used to be his only way of thinking… that is, until Hide had given him this note in his book the other day, at the same time giving him hope that not meeting again after spring is over is not the only possibility for them.  

For the next few minutes after Kaneki gets on the train, he’s reading his note inserted between the pages over and over as if finding a mistake, wondering if this whole thing is a mistake. This can be their only means of communication for now.

As the train arrives at Hide’s stop, he turns around a little to look outside the to see if he’s standing there. The weather isn’t exactly the best… Part of him wishes that he won’t be there to delay this idea of his a little longer, but another part wishes that he’d be standing there with those bright orange headphones because he knows he won’t see him for another weekend after this.

Breath hitching in his throat and eyes lighting up at the sight of sunshine in the rain, Kaneki immediately turns around before their eyes possibly meet and pretends to read the book as the train comes to a full stop and passengers start getting off and on the train. His vibe seems far too strong today because he can feel the moment Hide walks pass him, and he stops himself from lifting his gaze from the book.

Ah… he’s so nervous. His heart is beating a little too fast, isn’t it?

Peeking at Hide, he can see that he’s a little wet even though he had an umbrella with him. A little out of breath too as he combs back disheveled hair.

Had he been running?

 

**Hide:**

Yes, he had been running. It’s one of those days that his body decided to give itself a few more minutes of sleep and then a panic when he sees the time. He really didn’t want to miss the morning train to school so he forced himself to run as fast as he can when he realized he’d be late if he leaves the house later than fifteen minutes. 

The train waits for no one, even if you have someone you want to see.

He catches his breath for a little while, and hates the fact that it’s raining. He doesn’t like the rain very much – the gloominess drains the energy right out of him. His only source of energy is from knowing he might possibly see his friend, whose name he has yet to find out, today at the train.

All he’s been thinking about lately is what a dumb move he made the other day. A smart person would have left a phone number, or something. All he did was write a lame-ass joke. How is that even going to get him to want his number even a little? Well, anyway, at least he’s gotten to give his book back…

Leaning against the door, he looks across where the other boy is and catches him reading the same book he returned two days ago. He’s waiting for him to look at him, but he looks much too invested in the book. The second he catches him raising his head, he quickly ducks as if avoiding to be seen. Hide… doesn’t understand it. Did he not like the message? It’s like they’re back at square one, like nothing has changed since the beginning, with him reading at that corner and him listening to music at another. 

The train ride disappointingly uneventful.

It’s only by the time they reach one stop before his own does it get interesting.    


It’s the time the other will get off, and his eyes follow him out of habit. He doesn’t notice the way he puts down his book on his seat before walking to the door - not until he turns around and looks at him. Though he thinks he should have looked away so he can’t be accused of staring, he simply couldn’t, not when those eyes look like they’re calling for his attention.

He’d call it an anti-climatic moment. Just when he thought something amazing was about to happen between them with  _ that  _ single look, the door closes right in front of him. 

Wow, universe. You have let him down once again...

Or did it?

When the boy points to the right, Hide raises a curious brow. There’s not much time for clues when the train starts moving, so naturally, his eyes end up looking to the right -- No one is sitting at his seat yet, and all because of a lone book sitting there. His brows furrow in confusion, and his first instinct is to go over there and pick it up.

Isn’t this the book he just returned to him? Why would he leave it here?

Sitting down on the seat, seeing no one else is, Hide starts flipping through the pages of the book. The cogs just begin to turn in his head as the pages draw closer to the chapter he left his note in. A small gasp escapes him upon realization what this is all about, and Hide quickly flips through the pages until sees a note in the same place where he had left his bookmark. It’s clearly not the same note, and his heart swells upon seeing the clean handwriting. 

It reads:

**Hello Hide.  
You can have it first and return it to me when you’re done...  
I’m glad that you like it. I can tell by the well-thought out summary.  
It’s punny. **

Hah! He knew there was a reason he’s drawn to him. This note is definitely a sign, and a way of gods saying they’re giving him another chance not to fuck it up, because he might actually have a chance of seeing this boy outside of the train if he plays his cards right. Judging by the way the other is trusting his book with him, he thinks he’s on the right track.    


He’s most certainly pleased to see the other riding along. He’s also sort of happy to know that the other believed him when he said that he’s read it even with the pun that’s damn right “well thought out”. His face isn’t much of a “bookworm” type either, he’s been told. He wonders what gave him away.  

**Also, please be careful of the spine...**

**\- Kaneki**

Oh. Oops. 

But Hide can’t help but bite his bottom lip as he fights the urge to smile. 

_ After five weeks, he finally knows his name too.  _


	6. Week 6

**DAY 36**

Since Kaneki had so graciously lent Hide his book again, this time by an “intended accident”, he has so diligently read the rest of the book over the weekend. Kaneki will be proud of him if he finds out that he doesn’t actually read that often and that he honest to goodness enjoyed the book enough to  _ want  _ to read other books by the author, and perhaps other recommendations from Kaneki. He looks like he knows all the good books that there are. 

He’s not wearing his headphones today, and instead holds a book in his hand. 

When he enters the train, Hide glances to the left and smiles before he even realizes it when he sees Kaneki. He walks to the opposite side, but stops in his tracks when he feels like… maybe it wouldn’t be wrong at all to stand in front of him and not wait for the last minute to hand him the book. This time, he wouldn’t try the “drop-the-book” trick either. He’ll muster the energy to finally  _ talk  _ to him. 

It’s been, what, five, six weeks they’ve been seeing each other. It should be normal to start a conversation with him, wouldn’t it? With that resolve, Hide moves to stand in front of Kaneki who is suddenly looking up at him with grey eyes that almost look like he’s taken off guard. Believe him, he’s surprised with himself too --- 

Normally every morning, Kaneki really does look forward to the twenty minutes that he gets to see Hide. Now that he knows his name, and Hide knows  _ his  _ name, there is a hint of nervousness that goes along with the anticipation. He doesn’t really understand it, and he thinks he shouldn’t be feeling this way at all, but every time he sees those eyes glancing his way, his heart would start beating faster. Now, that’s just a glance -- so when he comes standing in front of him at a time he doesn’t expect him to, his heart races on cue. 

“Thanks for lending me your book. I don’t normally read books, but I liked this one,” Hide starts, holding out the item to the owner. Can he be blamed if he feels a tad bit nervous? 

Kaneki hesitantly takes the book off the hands of the other, looks at it and wonders if there is a note inside, but looks up at Hide with the faintest blush. 

“No problem… um...” He murmurs. He wants to say more, wants to keep this conversation going, but nothing comes in mind. He’s wracking his mind for something, anything to say, but he falls flat. He’s too nervous to think.

“You haven’t finished it yet, right? Should I tell you how it ends?”

“No!” Kaneki suddenly snaps and he covers his mouth with a hand at the outburst, cheeks flaring with embarrassment as other passengers look their way. He looks up at Hide and he sees him hiding his laughter behind his hand. He  _ anticipated  _ that reaction. “That’s mean…”

“I know.” Hide lowers his hand finally and reveals that grin that brings a little smile on Ken’s face too. He’s cute. 

Kaneki suddenly feels… a little more at ease than a few minutes ago. He realizes that Hide has that effect on someone, that he’s right when he thought he’s a person most people will feel easily comfortable around. He just has that friendly aura surrounding him… It’s not as nerve-wracking to talk to each other than he thought. 

There is a moment of silence between the two of them - a little awkward, sure - and obviously trying to think of something to say. Kaneki, in attempt to keep the conversation going, shyly asks, “So… what did you like about the book?”

“Ahh, do you know the Silence of the Lambs? Hannibal? I’m actually into those types of genre so I really liked this one. There were too many difficult words though, that’s why it took me a while to finish even though you were gone for a week.”

Kaneki listens attentively to Hide, and he’s actually amazed that they’re having an actual conversation with the other, that he can  _ think  _ of a response. “I know other books with similar themes. Maybe I can recommend you some.” The dark haired boy looks a little more enthusiastic when talking about books and sharing it to others, and Hide finds it so endearing. Even though he’s not an avid reader, he feels like he’d read any book this boy tells him to. 

“Really? Thanks! I wish I could recommend books too, but… hey, maybe I can recommend music you can listen to when --- do you listen to music when you study?” Because obviously, Kaneki doesn’t listen to music when he reads. Maybe when he studies?

“Not… really,” Yet as soon as he sees the faintest disappointment in Hide’s face, Kaneki isn’t able to hold his tongue blurts out, “b-but I’d like to know it!” 

He feels ridiculous - he doesn’t even listen to music normally - but it’s worth it when he sees Hide looking a little bit more enthusiastic. He realizes that perhaps music to Hide is like books to him. He’ll give it a try, like how Hide is giving books a try himself. 

“I’ll write it down for you then.” 

“Yeah, I’ll write my recommendations too.”

Faint giggling ensues at their conversation, Hide glances over the side to catch a couple of girls looking at their direction before pretending to look elsewhere. Hide wonders if they look funny...or if their conversation is...amusing? He doesn’t really know, but it just reminds him why chatting on the train is discouraging. The space is small enough for the whole train to hear if they’re loud enough. 

_ We are now approaching Shiinamachi Station.  _

Hide looks up at the map by the doors when Kaneki’s station is called, and he sheepishly smiles when he just revealed that he’s very much familiar with their routine. “This is where you go out, right?” Might as well own up to it. 

“Mhm.”

As the train stops, Hide steps out of the way so that Kaneki can leave. 

“See you on Wednesday…” Kaneki wants to say his name for the first time, “H-Hide.”

Hide holds the urge to burst out laughing at how adorable that had sounded that he waves at the other on his way out. “See you on Wednesday, Kaneki.” 

As soon as Kaneki steps out of that train and the door closes, he feels like he wants to scream. He… He just had a conversation with the boy who used to be a common face in the train, now they’re giving recommendations to books and music. The progression is … a little overwhelming. He wonders if this fortunate thing is really happening to him. 

He’s smiling to himself again as he looks at the book that had started this all. He tries not to be hopeful that there are good things to come from him, but with a person like Hide, it just can’t be helped. 

  
  


**DAY 38**

Hide wonders about that book and the note that he put between the pages before returning to Kaneki. He put his number in there, but he hasn’t heard from him at all. He doesn’t want to use the word disappointed, but it’s close enough. He thought after their conversation the other day, he’d be a little more willing to … extend it via messaging app. He guesses not. 

Another possibility is that Kaneki hasn’t seen it at all. He can’t message him if he doesn’t know his contact information. He thinks he likes this possibility much better than the former, but he’ll try to find out. Kaneki is a little easy to read, in his case, because his thoughts easily show in his face. 

Entering the train, instead of finding a seat or a corner to stand on, Hide decidedly stands in front where Kaneki sits. The dark haired boy is looking up at him with a smile, saying a quiet “good morning” as Hide grabs on one of the handles dangling from the ceiling. “Good morning, ‘Neki.”

“Good morning…”

The fact that he’s looking at him like he didn’t receive his phone number tells him that he hasn’t looked at the inside of the book yet. 

“Are you reading the book I returned?” 

“Ah, not yet. I’m finishing this one first.” Kaneki sheepishly shows him the cover of the book, and it is indeed not the book Hide has read. This means that he can’t talk about it yet since Kaneki dislikes being spoiled. He can wait - he feels like they have much time in their hands now. Sixty minutes for three days a week, in exact. 

Could be more if Kaneki looks at the “contents” of that book. 

“Well, give it a read soon. You’ll be…surprised at the ending.” 

The other nods. “Okay. I’m almost done with this - No spoiling,” Kaneki warns with a  little lighthearted laugh, though he’s unable to look at Hide in the eyes.

“I know, I know.” 

Since they’re already talking about books, Kaneki thinks of getting right to it, in mentioning that he’s made a physical list of books that Hide can read. There’s only more or less twenty minutes to talk, after all. “Um… by the way, the book recommendations…”

It’s a little embarrassing, considering how hard he thought of the books Hide can possibly like just from the fact he likes Hannibal and The Red Dragon and wrote it neatly on a piece of paper. He thought it was a little...over the top, and suddenly he has thoughts that Hide may not have been even serious about wanting recommendations.

The reaction tells him otherwise.

“You have it? Cool! I have my music recommendations too! It’s supposed to keep you focused while studying rather than fall asleep.” Hide was not at all kidding about the recommendations. If there is one thing that he knows about himself, he’s not all talk. He doesn’t flatter and set false expectations, not especially to a guy he’s been dying to talk to for weeks now. “Thanks.”

Kaneki looks almost in awe as he looks at that piece of paper held out to him, and he carefully takes it from his hand, replacing it with the one he made. He looks at the list -- none of them are familiar as Hide isn’t familiar with any of the books he wrote. 

“I have the songs in my phone if you want to listen to it.” 

Kaneki looks up with wide eyes at the sudden offer. Hide will let him borrow his headphones? Really? He couldn’t find the words at first, mouthing words Hide can’t quite comprehend. 

Kaneki nods stiffly, “Sure.” 

Well, he  _ has  _ been curious about the quality of it… 

Expecting that the other would remove his headphones from his neck, it mildly surprises Kaneki when Hide opens his bag to pull out earphones. First of all, why does he still have earphones in his bag? Second of all, is he implying that they’d be listening to it together? He is not prepared for that, at all. 

Kaneki tries not to sound so nervous as he watches Hide unplug his headphones and replace it with the earphones. “You keep extra earphones in your bag?”

“Yeah! Everyone with headphones should keep extra earphones in their bag.” Hide grins, so obviously joking, but in his case, not really, “So, you know, if the one they like wants to listen to music, they’d be ready.” 

He tries to ignore the unamused snort coming from the college student standing in front of them. 

“Oh.” 

Kaneki is definitely not blushing. He shouldn’t be blushing. Because Hide absolutely cannot be referring to him when he says that. So he’s not going to react - at all. However, his ears may be giving him away, because he sees Hide clearly trying not to grin as he hands him one of the ear buds. Kaneki reluctantly puts it on, Hide not at all helping how his heart will soon combust when he scoots a little closer. 

“Here’s the first song.”

Kaneki really wishes that he could focus on the music, but Hide is so close. 

If he only knew that Hide is feeling the same way too, unable to appreciate the song as usual because he has Kaneki by his side, sharing earphones with him as if they hadn’t just talked to each other yesterday for the first time, nor that this is just an excuse to be close to the other. He doesn’t feel like a creep this time too, when he feels the other lean a tad bit closer. He quite likes it.  


Needless to say, Kaneki does too. 

 

**DAY 40**

Hide can get used to this sort of routine with Kaneki, coming in at the morning train and standing in front of him to talk. Since they only have twenty minutes to talk to one another, it feels like there’s just too much that they can talk about. They like to make the most of it - though there appears to be a silent agreement that they won’t reveal certain things about about themselves, like where they go every morning, what school they go to and what not. They’re not at that level of train-friendship yet - however, Hide does feel free to ask Ken about his plans for the week-long vacation next week. 

“It’s Golden Week next week, isn’t it? Do...you have any plans?”

“Not really. I just added more shifts at work because I don’t have anything else to do...” As always, Kaneki speaks rather meekly when he answers, “...How about you?”

“No plans either. It’s too expensive for a college student to be going anywhere out of Tokyo at that time.” 

“Yeah…” 

“Mhm…”

Silence follows as the two of them look in different directions in thought at the revelation that neither of them have plans.  They’re both more or less free for the week-long vacation, and it’s likely that they won’t see each other then…unless they make it happen. There is a common thought going through their mind at that fact and can’t so easily say out loud. One of them has to though. 

“So next week–”

“Hide–”

They both stop before they get into what they want to say, both eyes looking up at each other expectantly. 

“What?”

“Uh... you first?” 

Hide scratches his cheek with his finger, glancing here and there an unable to maintain eye contact with the other who continues to stare in subtle anticipation. “Uh, well, next week… I was wondering if you’re free after work or something…we could meet some time. You know, not...in the train.” He’s hoping that he doesn’t look too nervous. Had they met some other way, maybe this would feel less daunting. He’s a person he’s met on the  _ train _ . No one asks someone they met in a train on a date. 

Kaneki should have expected that… He should have expected that, but that doesn’t stop his heart beating any faster when Hide asks him out. 

“Y...Yeah. I’d like that.” 

“Ah. You wanted to say something too?”

Kaneki chuckles before he even thinks of his words, “I don’t think it’s necessary.” 

As soon as they arrive at Ken’s stop, Kaneki says his goodbye and leaves the train with a smile that only could have been caused by Hide. It’s almost unbelievable how things are working out this way. They’ll hang out? During Golden Week? What day? What time? Where should they go? They weren’t able to talk about that because his stop came too soon. He supposes they can talk about it later. 

There is just one problem though. 

Hide didn’t give him his number. 


End file.
